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Comrade Holland

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Comrade Holland last won the day on March 17

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  1. Green: Red 2 +x Bear Comrade Holland Comrade Ben Tan: Ollie Hoot
  2. WARNING: The following information is being disseminated by an intoxicated and borderline retarded individual with absolutely no experience in gunsmithing or even the use of basic hand tools. Attempting to follow this guide will result in irreparable harm to your replica BB gun, your hands, limbs and/or face, as well as your state of mental health. Reading any further is highly discouraged. This post is tagged NSFW due to its reckless use of crude language, dangerous techniques, and low quality results. Viewer discretion is advised. Welcome to the fourth edition of Beatin' On Guns With A Fuckin' Hammer. I am your master of ceremonies, Comrade Holland, here to take you on another inebriated adventure deep into the world of Real-Steel to BB-Gun hardware conversion. Today we're focusing on fixing perhaps the single shittiest component of the AK-style BB gun-- THE MAGAZINES. If you only read one BOGWAFH, this should be it. I have broken over 30 BB-gun AK mags. Yeah, you read that right. My long, arduous tenure in BB gun war, a curse I wouldn't wish on anyone, has destroyed over THIRTY AK mags. Here's the lot of almost 20 broken magazines I posted for sale on Red Alliance... five years ago. The problem here is that these mags are 'secured' to the BB gun with only two tiny plastic nubs that rip and tear out of the magwell when the even the slightest bit of torque is applied to the Magnum-sized mags used by the AK. An endless number of scenarios can result in busted nubs that permanently take the mag out of commission. ALL brands are susceptible to this because they ALL source their plastic bodies from the same factory that makes Tampax Pearl. Remember the first rule of BB guns: ALL BB guns are garbage. Before we get started, we need to wet our whistles. The macronutrients in beer provide long lasting energy, vital for powering through strenuous BB gun tech sessions. Today we're drinking Yuengling Golden Pilsner. This was smuggled in from parts unknown to the Caliphate of Kentucky, which does not permit the sale of seasonal Yuengling. It has fantastic, otherworldly appearance. Aromas of cracker, rice, white bread dough, and lightly toasted biscuit; with lighter notes of lemon, pear, apple, herbal, grass, pepper, and yeast earthiness. Nice and pleasant mouthfeel with good balance of pale malt/rice and light-moderate earthy hop/fruity yeast notes; with high strength. We're going to be converting one of the most coveted AK magazines known to collectors-- the Soviet Aluminum AKM Waffle magazine. This mag was part of an attempt to modernize and lighten the carry loads of the Soviet Union's paratroopers and 'spestsnaz' units. The extremely high-precision tooling needed to create these space-age box magazines has been lost to Russian engineers since the 1960s. Because of their rarity, they command an extremely high price in the United States among collectors. Do yourself a favor and don't look up how much they cost. Alright, first get your old BB gun mag and mark where to cut on the new mag. If it's busted ass lip is removable, remove it. These photos were taken by a guest photographer. The bizarro camera ratio is making me a little sick.... yeah, that's it, the camera ratio. Grab a dremel and cut the lips off. Look at you, wincing like you're cutting into your own mother. It's just money, numbnuts, you'll make more of it. Always err on the conservative side and cut off less than you think is right, then sand to fit. Ok, let's start working on the internals. This set of internals has the rear locking lug molded into the internals, so let's cut it off. You know what the best part of using ultra-rare collector mags is when you're doing this conversion? The fit of the mag internals in the bodies is approximately as tight as a tranny's turd cutter-- that is to say-- not tight at all. On AK74 mags you gotta beat them into the body with a fuckin' hammer. Nice. Wait... Did I tell you the Aluminum Waffle mag also has a dark, gritty backstory that may be unsuitable for some audiences? You see, when the creator of the AK rifle, Mikhail Kalashnikov, got wind of its creation, he immediately drunk drove to the Iszhmash factory and wrapped his '58 Lada around a nearby Walnut tree. 'They say' he emerged, 100%, completely, bone sober, and then raked a nearby outhouse with machine gun fire. "YOU RETARDS MADE A RIFLE MAG OUTTA MELDED PBR CANS! ALL Y'ALL DIPSHITS ARE ABOUT AS SHARP AS A SACK A' WET MICE!" The Izsmash plant manager ran out, pleading for Mikhail to stop. Mikhail took a can of Grizzly Wintergreen from his back pocket and continued to perforate the outhouse. "This shit'll make you a goddamn... sexual... TY RAN asaurus" he muttered, before stumbling off. If Mikhail thinks the Champagne of Magazines is shit, it's safe to cut it up. True story. OK, let's make sure our whistles are not just wet, but REAL wet. Wetter than DJT's ballsack after Sean Hannity's opening monologue. Gunna rip into a SECOND brand of beer. You know the saying-- beer after liquor-- never been sicker. Beer after beer? You're fine to drive bro, just believe in yourself. Drill a new pin hole on the top and press the pin in with your bench vice. Hammer that floor plate on. Clamp those floorplate lips in your vice so it doesn't slide off. Test fit frequently. When you can rock and lock that mag, you're done. You now have a mag with military grade metal lugs that will never snap off... ever. Just another success in a long succession of successes, as per usual here at BOGWAFH. Let's close it out with a beauty shot of the mag and a group photo of Guffie's current core members. Bring it in close, boys. BTW: This will be the last Beatin' On Guns With A Fuckin' Hammer posted on AI. We have decided to change formats a little and post all future updates to the Guffie Coalition Youtube page, which can be found here: https://www.youtube.com/user/GuffieCoalition If you have any comments or concerns we'd love to hear them. Thanks for tolerating this garbage on your otherwise safe for work but mostly dead forum. HASTA LUEGO!
  3. No shields. MILSIM IS A MEME IN LESS THAN ONE WEEK! I mean it's a meme now too of course, but it'll be a meme on Saturday also.
  4. Depending on how crappy and/or rad the melee weapons are, we may allow them. Otherwise, just smack people with your springer. Try not to break it on them.
  5. Guffie Coalition does an in-depth review of a new heavy weapons system we will be deploying at this event:
  6. (click to enlarge) Travel BACK IN TIME to the earliest days of your illustrious BB gun carreer! Back, back, before the paparazzi and flashing cameras.... Way back, before those MILSIM events you went to and all the fame they brought... So far back, before all the hookers and the free blow.... Back to when you got your VERY FIRST airsoft gun. You cocked the slide of your trusty hunk of plastic-- so realistic!-- and knew that things would never be the same. Things were so simple then. No discharging LiPOs, no filling up your HPA tank, and the STD tests were almost always negative. You CAN go back! Join Guffie Coalition on July 14th for Operation: Cheap Gun Game. --- --- This will be a very simple set of skirmish games set around the premise of everyone using extremely crappy guns. Where: Joker's Circus Address: 2799 N Curry Pike, Bloomington, IN 47404 Cost: Free / Pay What You Want Hosted By: Guffie Coalition Unique Rules: -Every gun fielded must retail for under $50 MSRP. This means mostly springers, EBBs and LPEGS will be allowed. -Absolutely NO tactical gear on your upper body at all. None. No plate carriers, no chest rigs, no tac vests, nothing. This is both to help prevent heat casualties and make sure the shots from these weaker guns are felt. -ABSOLUTE MAXIMUM VELOCITY: 325fps w/ .2g BBs. -We will be spot checking guns for adequate crappiness. If your gun is too decent we will ask you to put it away. -There are NO magazine restrictions. -There are NO bolt / semi / full auto restrictions. -Full seal eye protection is required. No shootiing glasses permitted. No MESH is permitted either. -A red death rag is required. -You MUST have a terrible callsign to enter. Failure to acknowledge your teammates by their god awful callsign may result in negative points for your team. -For this event you will refer to me as Captain Hip-Hop-Opotamus. -We recommend that you bring at least two guns, in case of of them breaks (a lot of them will.) We are not charging anything for this event, but we will be spending money on it. If you enjoy this event, feel free to donate whatever you like. We will be giving all profits directly to IMPACT and Joker's Circus. Uniforms: -You are REQUIRED to wear nothing more than a simple T-shirt or wife-beater for this event. Please avoid loose clothing. This is to help prevent heat exhaustion and make sure the shots from these weaker guns are felt. -Remember, absolutely NO tactical gear is allowed on your chest. NOTHING. -Teams will be broken up with colored tape on the day of the game. Timeline: 900: Gates Open 900-1050: Check in and Chrono 1050: Pre-Briefing 1100: Deployment 1130: Game1 start 1430: Big ass exodus to Taco Bell because BB gun warriors can't play for more than 3 hours without getting the hunger for more soy-laced "beef" product. 1530: Game2 start 1630-??? More games (game modes depend on number of people and interest in playing) BE ON TIME. We will be holding a free raffle to win an extremely rare, customized pistol. Stay tuned.
  7. +1, great trading experience with Hanback, everything went silky smooth.
  8. Totally forgot I had this stuff... got it in a trade years ago so I don't know much about it, feel free to ask any questions. -x60+ 'Hole Plugs.' These are for those 40mm shells that can launch paintballs and/or whatever else you want. -x2 TAG Launcher Shells -x7 TAG Grenades. Impact Sound/Flash. -x4 Original Mini Nerf Footballs. Perfect fit for 40mm launchers, the original for anti-vehicle use. -Crappy BBs for use with 40mm shower shells $150 shipped for all Will trade for silver coins, 00 buckshot, 7.62x39, 9x19, kegs of beer
  9. WTB: One AK74 style muzzle brake Can be real or fake, any brand or thread pattern. PM me offers. Thanks.
  10. Comrade Ben and I are going to try to make it to this game for the Green team. Looking forward to it. We both have a bunch of Soviet/Russian/Combloc trinkets we're bringing to sell.
  11. WARNING: The following information is being disseminated by an intoxicated and borderline retarded individual with absolutely no experience in gunsmithing or even the use of basic hand tools. Attempting to follow this guide will result in irreparable harm to your replica BB gun, your hands, limbs and/or face, as well as your state of mental health. Reading any further is highly discouraged. This post is tagged NSFW due to its reckless use of crude language, dangerous techniques, and low quality results. Viewer discretion is advised. Welcome to our third edition of Beatin' On Guns With A Fucking Hammer. This series covers the conversion of real steel parts to fit AK-style BB guns. Today we're going to do a very quick one-- the conversion of the AK safety lever. Before we get started let's have a discussion on why would we want to do this conversion in the first place. Almost every modern AK-style BB gun comes standard with a metal safety lever that should provide many years of reliable service. Even on the cheap CYMA and Dboys models, this part is made from quality stamped steel, exactly like a real one. So why even bother? It could be that you're looking to downgrade your gun with a bunch of gimmicky bullshit. For example, take this Krebs Custom Mk VII Enhanced Safety that retails for around $80. It has an extra dong for your fingering pleasure, not to mention the gaping hole. Seriously, it's a MK VII, it took them seven tries to get that dong right, GOTTA be worth it. It's also possible that your stock safety lever has worn out. Although on most BB guns this part is steel, it is a mild steel that is not heat treated or hardened in any way. With a lot of rough use it's possible to wallow out the hole and cause it to no longer fit correctly. Remember the first rule of BB guns: All BB guns are garbage. Finally, it could just be that nothing gets your panties more sopping wet than genuine, high-grade, non-flaccid Bulgarian steel. Between you and me, that's why these posts are 'really' marked NSFW, not because of the language, I just don't want of bunch of screamin' bitches flicking the bean at work. Get your heads in the game ladies. OK, TIME TO GET SCHLITZED. This conversion won't take very long, so be sure to start drinking at least three hours before attempting this mod. You can't focus on safety too much when you're working on a safety lever-- that's just science. Today we're drinking Labatt Blue. Based at least in part on a historic recipe from Guinness, this beer displays what a porter may have been like hundreds of years ago before roasted malts became darker and more in fashion. It's a clear deep amber/brown in color beneath a creamy off-white head that holds well and leaves almost solid rings of lacing about the glass. The aroma is toasty, just slightly like coffee, grainy, and very lightly caramelish. The mouthfeel follows with more nuttiness and a hint of leafy hops. Mainly it's toasty and nutty, although there is a touch of fruitiness to it. Just kidding, I'd rather eat kim-chi out of Kim-Jong's asshole than take one more sip of this rancid semi-liquid cat shit. Everyone knows the god damn canooks haven't been able to brew beer since America kicked their Frenchy balls in during 1812. Maybe we'll give you your precious Molson back when you decide to stop licking the Queen's boot. Down to business. Here's our safety levers, real-steel Bulgarian on the left and fake-steel Taiwanian on the right. We're going to use hand tools for this job. Yeah, that probably won't be too bad. Set the safety in a bench vice. Get a file and start working on that left nut. Keep on filing. More filing. Took me a little under 10 minutes to get to this point, my quads are really aching but no big deal. There we go. Told you this would go fast. The next step is simple. Just grab a screw driver, align it with the center of the circle, and start beating the fuck out of it with a god damn hammer. Eventually you'll pop the leaf that would actuate the internals on a real AK out the back. We're on a roll, baby. Now just flip the safety lever over. Grab a flat head screwdriver and your hammer, and just pop this reinforced ring on the backside off. Check it out... The remaining hole in the safety lever... is EXACTLY the same size and shape as the BB gun nut thing. HOLY FUCKIN' SHIT HOMBRE. Why the fuck does this work? Those morons couldn't get the fucking receiver dimensions to real-steel spec, yet the INSIDE of this part is a 100% perfect fit for their random ass BB gun pot metal garbage. Why? WHY? WE DON'T KNOW AND WE NEVER WILL KNOW. It's a mystery as old as BB guns themselves. Why does the random ass shit fit the other random ass shit? Perhaps one day we'll get a japanimation translator on the phone with Marui and force them to explain this paradoxical mandela effect conspiracy bullshit. Until that time, mankind will continue to wander in darkness. We have achieved perfection! Sort of. Not that different from when we started, really. Perfection!
  12. +1 for Sturm, he's a very good buyer and excellent guy to work with. Fast communication and payment.
  13. The real tragedy with Rim Job 2 was that we had a sand castle building contest and dance competition planned but too many people dropped out before we could get to it. Bummer.
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