WARNING: The following information is being disseminated by an intoxicated and borderline retarded individual with absolutely no experience in gunsmithing or even the use of basic hand tools. Attempting to follow this guide will result in irreparable harm to your replica BB gun, your hands, limbs and/or face, as well as your state of mental health. Reading any further is highly discouraged. This post is tagged NSFW due to its reckless use of crude language, dangerous techniques, and low quality results. Viewer discretion is advised.
Welcome to the fourth edition of Beatin' On Guns With A Fuckin' Hammer. I am your master of ceremonies, Comrade Holland, here to take you on another inebriated adventure deep into the world of Real-Steel to BB-Gun hardware conversion.
Today we're focusing on fixing perhaps the single shittiest component of the AK-style BB gun-- THE MAGAZINES. If you only read one BOGWAFH, this should be it.
I have broken over 30 BB-gun AK mags. Yeah, you read that right. My long, arduous tenure in BB gun war, a curse I wouldn't wish on anyone, has destroyed over THIRTY AK mags. Here's the lot of almost 20 broken magazines I posted for sale on Red Alliance... five years ago.
The problem here is that these mags are 'secured' to the BB gun with only two tiny plastic nubs that rip and tear out of the magwell when the even the slightest bit of torque is applied to the Magnum-sized mags used by the AK. An endless number of scenarios can result in busted nubs that permanently take the mag out of commission. ALL brands are susceptible to this because they ALL source their plastic bodies from the same factory that makes Tampax Pearl. Remember the first rule of BB guns: ALL BB guns are garbage.
Before we get started, we need to wet our whistles. The macronutrients in beer provide long lasting energy, vital for powering through strenuous BB gun tech sessions. Today we're drinking Yuengling Golden Pilsner. This was smuggled in from parts unknown to the Caliphate of Kentucky, which does not permit the sale of seasonal Yuengling. It has fantastic, otherworldly appearance. Aromas of cracker, rice, white bread dough, and lightly toasted biscuit; with lighter notes of lemon, pear, apple, herbal, grass, pepper, and yeast earthiness. Nice and pleasant mouthfeel with good balance of pale malt/rice and light-moderate earthy hop/fruity yeast notes; with high strength.
We're going to be converting one of the most coveted AK magazines known to collectors-- the Soviet Aluminum AKM Waffle magazine. This mag was part of an attempt to modernize and lighten the carry loads of the Soviet Union's paratroopers and 'spestsnaz' units. The extremely high-precision tooling needed to create these space-age box magazines has been lost to Russian engineers since the 1960s. Because of their rarity, they command an extremely high price in the United States among collectors. Do yourself a favor and don't look up how much they cost.
Alright, first get your old BB gun mag and mark where to cut on the new mag. If it's busted ass lip is removable, remove it.
These photos were taken by a guest photographer. The bizarro camera ratio is making me a little sick.... yeah, that's it, the camera ratio.
Grab a dremel and cut the lips off. Look at you, wincing like you're cutting into your own mother. It's just money, numbnuts, you'll make more of it.
Always err on the conservative side and cut off less than you think is right, then sand to fit.
Ok, let's start working on the internals. This set of internals has the rear locking lug molded into the internals, so let's cut it off.
You know what the best part of using ultra-rare collector mags is when you're doing this conversion? The fit of the mag internals in the bodies is approximately as tight as a tranny's turd cutter-- that is to say-- not tight at all. On AK74 mags you gotta beat them into the body with a fuckin' hammer. Nice.
Wait... Did I tell you the Aluminum Waffle mag also has a dark, gritty backstory that may be unsuitable for some audiences? You see, when the creator of the AK rifle, Mikhail Kalashnikov, got wind of its creation, he immediately drunk drove to the Iszhmash factory and wrapped his '58 Lada around a nearby Walnut tree. 'They say' he emerged, 100%, completely, bone sober, and then raked a nearby outhouse with machine gun fire. "YOU RETARDS MADE A RIFLE MAG OUTTA MELDED PBR CANS! ALL Y'ALL DIPSHITS ARE ABOUT AS SHARP AS A SACK A' WET MICE!" The Izsmash plant manager ran out, pleading for Mikhail to stop. Mikhail took a can of Grizzly Wintergreen from his back pocket and continued to perforate the outhouse. "This shit'll make you a goddamn... sexual... TY RAN asaurus" he muttered, before stumbling off. If Mikhail thinks the Champagne of Magazines is shit, it's safe to cut it up. True story.
OK, let's make sure our whistles are not just wet, but REAL wet. Wetter than DJT's ballsack after Sean Hannity's opening monologue. Gunna rip into a SECOND brand of beer. You know the saying-- beer after liquor-- never been sicker. Beer after beer? You're fine to drive bro, just believe in yourself.
Drill a new pin hole on the top and press the pin in with your bench vice.
Hammer that floor plate on. Clamp those floorplate lips in your vice so it doesn't slide off.
Test fit frequently. When you can rock and lock that mag, you're done. You now have a mag with military grade metal lugs that will never snap off... ever.
Just another success in a long succession of successes, as per usual here at BOGWAFH. Let's close it out with a beauty shot of the mag and a group photo of Guffie's current core members. Bring it in close, boys.
BTW: This will be the last Beatin' On Guns With A Fuckin' Hammer posted on AI. We have decided to change formats a little and post all future updates to the Guffie Coalition Youtube page, which can be found here: https://www.youtube....GuffieCoalition
If you have any comments or concerns we'd love to hear them. Thanks for tolerating this garbage on your otherwise safe for work but mostly dead forum. HASTA LUEGO!
Edited by Comrade Holland, 08 March 2019 - 08:47 PM.